Saturday, June 20, 2009


I'm panicking about things that I shouldn't be panicking about. Things over which I have no control.
I have so much stuff.
What to get rid of?
What to give to my niece (who is about to move to NYC)?
What to store?
When do I list my bed for sale? I need to sleep on it but I don't want to wait so long that I don't have time for it to sell.

My niece was supposed to be here a couple of months ago but her boyfriend's job keeps getting they still aren't here. I'm pawning so much stuff onto her that I want her to get to the City so that I can get this stuff OUT OF MY ROOM. I'm so sick of looking at piles. I am so ready to be free from all of this STUFF.

Don't get me wrong...part of my panic is about all of this stuff in my room....the other part of my panic is HOW WILL I LIVE WITHOUT ALL MY STUFF?!!

I have this fear that I'll be back to NYC in a couple of months and want/need all my stuff back. The stuff that has taken me years, a lifetime, to accumulate. But I know that it's just the side of me talking who has always needed the steady paycheck, who was too afraid to jump off like this. So I'm not going to listen to her. I'm going to listen to the free spirit, the one who wants to travel, to learn about other cultures, to live in new places, and who will make it through even without knowing whether or not I'll have a job come September 3rd.

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